About The Intimate Gentleman

Being a man isn’t always easy.

Dating can be frustrating. Sex can be intimidating. Rejection can hurt. You can be surrounded by people and still feel lonely, or look confident on the outside while quietly wondering whether you’re good enough.

And when you’re struggling with those things, there’s certainly no shortage of people willing to tell you what’s wrong with you — or who is to blame.

The Intimate Gentleman takes a different approach.

We’re here to help men become more confident, comfortable and fulfilled in their relationships, their sex lives and themselves. That means talking honestly about the things that don’t always get talked about: dating, attraction, sex, sexual confidence, body image, loneliness, relationships, masculinity, rejection and all the insecurities that can come with them.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to become a more confident man. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be attractive, successful, sexually confident or masculine. And there is certainly nothing wrong with wanting a better sex life.

But becoming a better man doesn’t require putting someone else down.

Men Don’t Need To Be Ashamed Of Being Men

We believe in a modern masculinity that doesn’t require men to choose between being strong and being vulnerable.

You can be ambitious and still have doubts. You can enjoy traditionally “manly” things and still talk about your feelings. You can be sexually confident without being disrespectful. You can be assertive without being arrogant. You can want to lead without believing that everyone else needs to follow.

Being a good man doesn’t mean becoming a softer, watered-down version of yourself.

It means becoming a better version of yourself.

That also means accepting that men have real problems. Loneliness, insecurity, sexual anxiety, rejection and a lack of confidence can have a huge impact on your life. Pretending they don’t exist doesn’t help anyone.

Neither does telling you that women are responsible for them.

Women Aren’t The Enemy

Some advice aimed at frustrated or inexperienced men can start with genuine problems and end up somewhere incredibly negative.

It can teach men to see dating as a battle, women as something to manipulate, or rejection as an injustice. That might provide an easy explanation for why you’re struggling, but it doesn’t give you a healthy way forward.

We don’t believe women are the enemy.

Women are people — complicated, imperfect, attractive, frustrating, funny, interesting and sometimes difficult, just like men are. Dating isn’t a war between the sexes, and learning how to connect with women shouldn’t require learning to resent them.

You don’t have to hate women to become confident with them.

In fact, learning to understand, respect and genuinely enjoy the company of women is a much better foundation for a successful dating and sex life.

Your Life Is Still In Your Hands

This isn’t about pretending everything is easy.

You can’t control whether somebody finds you attractive. You can’t control who rejects you, how somebody behaves, or whether a particular relationship works out.

But there is a hell of a lot you can control.

You can work on your confidence. You can improve your appearance. You can become better at conversation. You can learn how attraction actually works. You can understand your own sexuality. You can become more comfortable with rejection. You can build a healthier social life. You can learn how to have better sex and become a better partner.

And you can do all of that without becoming someone you don’t like.

That’s what The Intimate Gentleman is about.

We’re men writing for men, with no interest in lecturing you or pretending we have everything figured out. We’ll talk openly about sex, dating, relationships, confidence and masculinity — including the subjects that can be embarrassing, uncomfortable or difficult to admit.

Because becoming a better man isn’t about proving that you’re better than somebody else.

It’s about becoming someone you’re proud to be.